What Are the Advantages of Being Overweight?

Can you think of any reasons why you might want to remain over- weight? This might seem like a strange question - that you might resist losing weight, even though you are com- mitted to losing weight! But search deeply inside yourself and you might well find that you have powerful "uncon- scious reasons" for wanting to hold on to your weight and keep life just as it is!

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"Be honest with yourself"

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Ask yourself the difficult question: What are the ad- vantages of staying over- weight? Be honest with yourself - there could be some well-hidden secrets involved here. Then write a list of what you come up with. For exam- ple:

• Less is expected of a fat person


• Weight can be a protective shield


• Being fat reduces sexual threat


• No one bothers a big person


• Being heavy gains you sympathy


• Losing weight is threatening to others

Let's look at two related points: "A protective shield" and "To reduce sexual threat." How does being overweight protect you sexually?

Well, suppose for some reason you're shy or insecure, and you fear dating. By making sure you stay overweight, you believe that you can avoid being seen as physically attractive or appealing, and that therefore you'll be left alone. Avoiding such flattering attention might seem odd on the face of it. However, beneath the surface, you might find it less threatening to hide inside your weight, rather than to put yourself into an intimate and sexually frightening situation.

Such unconscious reasons are not only real but are worthwhile exploring as you begin learning how to lose weight. If you feel something blocking your progress and you can't get to it on your own, you may wish to seek assistance from a trained therapist.

There are times when a serious childhood trauma, such as physical, mental or emot- ional abuse, forms the basis of your unconscious resistance, and in these cases professional counselling is best.

© 2004 Dr. Brian Alman